Aspen is happy about everything.
Of course, there are contexts which are not pleasant for her, as for anybody else.
For instance, every time we split after the short time we spend together, she is sad and so am I.
But after she finished with this separation sadness, she’s happy again.
She expressed what she had to express (and I never try to refrain her from doing that.) For example, the sweater/coat I designed especially for her earlier in the year. She wanted ruffled sleeves…and she told me as it was.
She then returns to her natural state. Which is being happy just about everything.
Too often I forget that.
Too often I prefer to cling on my own sadness, anger, or frustration long after the cause of whatever bad feelings I had disappeared.
In this process, I create tons and tons of reasons for hating my life.
I forget that I don’t need reasons for being happy.
Happiness is an unreasonable state of my being.
It’s also the fundamental state of my being.
During our gatherings this week, I saw that Aspen is very social (unlike before,) ever more confident, and is learning every single second and her curiosity never stops.
Somehow, she finds a way to enjoy and mentally devour every single piece of new information that enters her horizon. She plays small dialogues. She tells stories about her friends where she last lived in Wisconsin. Every single second, she learns…and she plays. (Isn’t she just sassy in the dress her mum designed and knitted for her?!)
Whenever I was with her, I refilled my curiosity too. As adults, I lost this more and more. Not that I know everything. Somehow, I’ve weakened my curiosity muscle and let boredom conquer most everything I have inside. I realize something absolutely incredible: Aspen was actually helping me around. In a childish and selfless way, of course.
Every time I had one of those glitches, seeing her in her fantastic sense of making her own world actually smooth things out for me. I don’t think it was a conscious plan. I literally learned from her moving through her emotions with zero efforts and zero regrets, in a variety of situations.
Talk is not really necessary. Many times, words are just staying in my way. I may have a decent level of communication only by being myself. Sooner or later people will get to know me and I’ll communicate without words.
If I don’t want to do a thing, well, there’s nobody in the world who can force me into it. I only do what I really want…I’m still learning this. Aspen is leaving for home tomorrow and my heart already aches!
With that, chickadees, I’m off to catch up on some much-missed time in dream-land. Have a magical night!
Happy crafting and keep those creative juices running!
(still doesn’t do texting, MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, StumbleUpon, DiggIt…)